TackoonXD

Hello there everyone,

I have so much to tell you....

1) Happy Thanksgiving to those that celebrate this holiday. I'm so thankful for all of you guys who love and support me. I know I don't always respond, but trust me I love every message and I enjoy reading what you guys write. 

2) My con season is officially over!!! I know it's sad, but it gives me a break for the rest of the year which means I can finally catch up on all the edits I have to do. And believe me there are so many. 

3) As most of you know on the 24th of November I turned 24. I'm getting so old....ugh it sucks, but hey this is life right. 

4) TODAY I BOUGHT A BRAND NEW CAMERA!!!! IT'S SO PRETTY YOU GUYS. I CAN'T EVEN EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE IT. I STOOD IN LINE FOR AN HOUR, IN THE COLD, WAITING FOR BEST BUY TO OPEN. MY TOES WERE PRETTY MUCH GONE. BUT IT WAS VERY MUCH WORTH IT. 

5) Lastly...guys if you haven't already remember to go on over to facebook and like my photography page. Way more updates. Way more photos. Way more awesome. www.facebook.com/eyeofapanda and also feel free to follow me in instagram under MIND_OFA_PANDA you guys are all amazing. Thanks for all the love and support. 

HEY FELLOW FOLLOWERS AND FOLLWERETTE'S HAHA,

If you haven't already you should remember to go check out my photography page on facebook and keep up with me to see my new stuff. Don't forget...

www.facebook.com/EyeOfAPanda

GO CLICK THAT LIKE BUTTON AND HELP ME OUT. WORKING MY BUTT OFF ALL THE TIME TO IMPROVE MY SKILLS. THANKS FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT. :] STAY AWESOME. 

LOVE YOU GUYS!!!! 

HEY EVERYONE,

I KNOW IT'S BEEN SO LONG SINCE I'VE WRITTEN OR POSTED ANYTHING. I MISS YOU ALL SO MUCH AND I'M SORRY FOR BEING SO CRAZY BUSY, BUT I HAVE SOME WONDERFUL NEWS....I'VE STARTED MY OWN PHOTOGRAPHY PAGE ON FACEBOOK AND I'M BECOMING MORE LEGIT AND I FINALLY GOT PHOTOSHOP CS6!!! ISN'T THAT AWESOME?!?!?!?!?!?! ANYWAY YOU GUYS SHOULD TOTALLY GO AND FOLLOW/LIKE/SHARE AND ENJOY BECAUSE THERE IS SO MORE TO COME. THANKS FOR READING THIS AND BEING AWESOME. DON'T FORGET TO KEEP UP WITH PANDASTOPTHEBULLYING ON FACEBOOK AS WELL. 

WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/EYEOFAPANDA
WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/PANDASTOPTHEBULLYING

CHECK THOSE BOTH OUT IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY. 

SOME QUICK UPDATES:

1) Still working at Jimmy Johns and now training to be a manager. 
2) I now own a kitty and her name is Zenith.
3) I will not, as well as the rest of NYAH, be going to Cosplacon due to money issues. 
4) My next convention is going to be Anime Iowa and if you see me you better say hi because you're all adorable :] 
5) I'll hopefully be posting more on here and also on my facebook. 
6) I hope to start doing photoshoots at conventions and outside of them this year. It's just a lot of work and a lot to edit. Good thing I don't have any deadlines. 

Love you guys and keep smiling :] 

Hey guys, 

My life is constant bullshit. A constant struggle. A constant fight that just never seems to end. This morning so far has already put me in a bad mood and I really just want to cry and shut out the entire world. I'm sick of the belittlement. I'm sick of the berating. Honestly I thought everything was fine. It has been, but of course all good things must end. And with my family the good things end a lot faster. 

So my aunt tells me the following this morning:

• My uncle notices I'm unhappy or upset about something
• My aunt tells me from now on everyday my job is to do dishes, clean the bathroom, and keep the living room clean. 
• My aunt then tells me I'm to help her with my cousins homework everyday after school. 
• My uncle has been telling her I've been eating his cereal and that must stop. Which I haven't been eating his cereal at all. 
• My aunt tells me I must sign up for food stamps and I need to start donating plasma and paying my uncle if I want to eat anything. 
• My aunt tells me I'm the kind of person people throw out of their house because I think it's all about me. 
• I put my friends first before my family.

After all of this she tells me if something is on my mind would I talk to her about it. I say yes, when in reality I've never expressed myself to her about anything because it would be pointless. 

I just wish she'd notice I'm trying. I'm working my ass off to get a job, to make money, to help out. I'm fucking trying. I'm trying so hard. I'm doing everything I possibly can. You all have no idea how poor I really am. 

I'm just trying to hold on. To grasp anything and to hold on tight. To fight to keep going because seriously these last few years I've been battling the worst depression I've ever had and I just want to give up all the time. 

I'm just not happy.